From time immemorial people were converting water into wine, but we have converted it into fuel, because of our belief in the betterment of all mankind. Ground breaking contribution of Aqua Waqar Al-Kindi-wal-YouTube to the world of science would be greater than Dr. Abdus Salam. He shall be awarded Nobel laureate award for correcting the laws of thermodynamics that were standing on its head for two centuries. After all these scientific laws are not divine laws but merely man-made laws and can be broken anytime. Thermodynamics is the enemy of mankind, and was an obstacle to break the shackles of slavery of Western imperialism.

At last, a knight in shining armour from Khairpur slayed the dragon of Thermodynamics. The Aqua kit has not only demolished the western secular science but is going to liberate all mankind from the exploitation of the Western Hegemony. If Karl Marx was alive today he would have written ‘Das Aqua kit’ instead of ‘Das Capital’.

The Mashaikh-ul-Science, great nuclear scientist and Urdu columnist Dr. Abdul Jabir bin Hayan and Dr Fruit Congratulations mand have blessed the Aqua kit. Their ruling in support of Aqua-fuel kit was an arrow pierced into the hearts of unpatroitic scums who are prostrated before the false idol of western science. It was their untiring effort of photocopying skills and spreading the Halal science (according to the palette of our masses) on media that have prepared the ground for scientific revolution in Pakistan. The nation should pay back these Mashaikh-ul-science by making them president, and Prime Minister as Indians have done years ago. These three have turned Pakistan into Aqua-con valley and Khairpur would be next Bangalore.

Not only Al Kindi-wal-youtube demolished the laws of themodynamics, but our media has also demolished the concept of idiot-box. Now the ratings-fuelled channels are being used as laboratories of science. TV studios have turned into Kon Research Laboratories, and research (google) papers are being aired to spread the light of halal scientific knowledge. All TV channels have totally converted their generators from gasoline to Aqua Kit.

It’s time that we must stand united and repose our belief in our own homegrown talent. It is our national duty to believe in Aqua kit. We must also believe that corruption can be eliminated in 19 days. We shall strengthen our belief in media that is the source of providing information and awareness to the people. Media is going to liberate our nation from the chains of colonial science.

Dr. Jabir bin Hayanhas said that all great scientists and achievers like Einstein, Steve jobs, Bill Gates were all school drop outs. By the grace of God, we have the highest school dropoutrate in the world. This great pool of dropouts is producing scientists, like Aqua Waqar-Al-Kindi, and IT specialist like Steve Arsalan. His meteoric 900 million IT industry is proof of our robust economy. It’s the inefficient government that can’t run this country’s economy that is going on snail’s pace of 2 per cent. Steve Arsalan has also demolished the Babu’s economy and proved that the actual economic growth of Pakistan can be pushed to 300 per cent.

Dr. Fruit congratulationsmand and Dr. Abdul Jabr bin Hayanare now ready to work under Dr Aqua Waqar al-kindiwal YouTube for self-enrichment..er..sorry… uranium enrichment with Aqua kit. They are now developing factories in Malaysia, Srilanka and head office in Dubai. The next step would be to build a Bin Qasim, Ghaznavi, Alp Arsalan and Zawahiri missiles powered by aqua kit. Hydrogen converted into helium from one glass of water can make a missile cover 3ooo km. Some armchair professors who have not invented anything are calling them crackpots. Oye! They are our Jackpots. We would be saving 14 billion dollar annually from oil imports. Imagine the export and construction of the Water kit. The western imperialists would be out to kill him to rob us of victory that we achieved working so hard on Google. Government shall provide him all resources and funds to realise the dream of dominating the world. Protecting Dr. al-Kindi should be the first priority of this government.


Comments are closed.

Comments (44)

schirvani
August 14, 2012 12:38 pm
better join architecture (again).
hussain asif
August 13, 2012 3:09 pm
an outstanding write *hats off*
Chickoo Khan
August 11, 2012 3:14 am
Push the Car and Drink the Water when Tired...
mohammed
August 10, 2012 3:37 pm
great hats off
mohammed
August 10, 2012 3:27 pm
not all is jealousy...some rational approach is also needed
mohammed
August 10, 2012 3:23 pm
if u want to be great scientist you should need to be drop out from your school and sit under the apple tree..science will be in your lap like famous newton.. apple ..
Nadir
August 10, 2012 7:09 am
what a beautiful article,,,,kudos for the writer,,,,amazing humour, made me laugh to the full after long long time of depression ...Thanks
Farrukh
August 10, 2012 3:53 am
Can a car run on water, as Agha Waqar proclaims or not, is a scientific question that has nothing to do with religion. I am skeptical about his invention as well just like Ar. Ata ur Rehman and Dr. Pervez Hoodbhoy, but on scientific and technical grounds. Why do people like yourself and Nadeem F. Paracha have to turn every debate into a debate against Islam in particular and religion in general? Being liberal and being an atheist are two different things. Unfortunately, people like you tend to use them interchangeably. Infact, I personally tend to see yours and NFP's views as atheist extremist and not liberal at all. If you want to debate about something, whether in favour or against, you must read about it thoroughly first.
ghassankhan
August 9, 2012 11:58 pm
Love your satire humor. You make this tragedy sound like a joke. Thumbs up!
Laughing Pakistani
August 9, 2012 11:03 pm
come on dude ! dont paint the whole picture with the same brush. We have produced the best Humour in Urdu and Punjabi. English it slowly getting its place.
saju
August 9, 2012 2:18 pm
mother of all invenion were emerged from from nessesity, and from dream, in future, it could be, as the water chemistry H2O, 2 Hydrogen atoms,1 Oxygen,.As Hydrogen is a good fuel, by product is only good Oxygen. But how we put in to practical?...more hard work is requiered in this direction.(today dream is tomorow fact).
Hermes
August 9, 2012 7:34 am
No these cartoons and its narrative are far better than NFP !
Ijaz Ahmad
August 9, 2012 6:41 am
Yes the way Mr. Agha appreciated Dr. Ata live on show
sri1
August 9, 2012 4:42 am
I am as much a believer of science of the next person, but am an automation engineer by profession. There have been many theories about a "resonance-based" water fuel cell that defies Thermodynamics laws ever since Stanley Meyer (another engineer dropout) claimed to have invented one in the nineties. What this camp claims is that it is **NOT NORMAL ELECTROLYSIS**, but a low power kick-started, self-sustaining, dielectric breakdown of water using resonance. There have been a slew of conspiracy theories about how Stanley Mayer's sudden death was actually an assassination by big oil in the late nineties, to nip the "Water fuel cell" movement in the bud. This Aqua Ahmad's fuel cell also seems to be one of the numerous attempts to replicate Meyer's fuel cell from fuel cell "white papers" available on the net, so maybe Ahmad was smart to have latched on to an already murky issue. Having said all that, my training as an engineer tells me to dismiss all this brouhaha only after completely testing and debunking the fuel cell as fraud. Otherwise the hope is that there is some truth to it, unfortunately science does not run on hope.
mohammad
August 9, 2012 3:20 am
i support raheem solangi and zahid ali. they have written very nice comments. ar least encourage the man who tries to do something. you writers only write but itneeds lot of efforts to make an utopian idea practicable.
Subhan
August 9, 2012 3:08 am
Zabardast! Kudos to NFP to have spawned a wonderful new generation of biting satirists across newspapers.
Cyrus Howell
August 8, 2012 5:14 pm
That is the major problem in Pakistani - no sense of humour.
Cyrus Howell
August 8, 2012 5:13 pm
Don't you mean do anything practical to hoodwink the common people? I am in my basement right now attempting to turn water into gold. I have been up all night. It won't be long. I think I have the answer. It is like the Imp in the Bottle story. My gold will last just long enough for me to pawn it off on someone else. I'll call it impermanent gold, so I can't be sued in a court of law. Caveat Emptor. If I can make my gold last two weeks I can sell it mail order.
Faraz
August 8, 2012 5:07 pm
It's been a while since this water kit made its way on to the mainstream media. A) Has the engineer registered a patent yet? NO B) Has this idea been officially endorsed by the government? NO C) Has he come up with any sort of figures/fact against the doubts being raised other then that he can run the car on water? NO D) Has any national/multinational company shown any interest in his water kit? NO It's all false claims my friend. Don't be so gullible.
Atheoi
August 8, 2012 3:01 pm
Excellent Work.
Anand
August 8, 2012 2:56 pm
There is only one original and that's NFP.
raheem
August 8, 2012 2:48 pm
nothing is impossible......
gill
August 8, 2012 1:48 pm
Can't stop laughing....
Agha Ata
August 8, 2012 1:16 pm
How about drawing some cartoons instead?
Zunaira Gul
August 8, 2012 12:25 pm
One of the best I have read in many days!! keep up the good work
nayeem
August 8, 2012 12:12 pm
you are not NFP
Shahan
August 8, 2012 11:40 am
All show anchors, scientists, politicians as well as the so called INVENTOR, should be punished for misleading the nation.
Huqqa Corner
August 8, 2012 11:37 am
Only one Nadeem F Paracha is enough for us.
hameed
August 8, 2012 11:35 am
u guys are growing in number , Dawn must reproduce stuff from NFP Sabir Nazar for larger readership.
ZAhid Ali
August 8, 2012 10:53 am
all those who oppose rather then encourage the Waqar, if he fails , yet we appreciate him, at least he tried to do something as compare to those who write jealousy articles but can not do any thing practically for the benefit of common people.
Shahriar Shirazi
August 8, 2012 10:45 am
Article is too much NFPish ... Anyways, apart from the "engineer", Dr. Qadeer was also an embarrassment . What a shame !
Zeeshan Shamsi
August 8, 2012 10:45 am
This is just too funny! Amazing write up. Please keep it up, we need more of this.
Hasanalirana
August 8, 2012 10:27 am
The inefficiency of starved (from spicy, chaotic junk information/entertainment) media was revealed explicitly. Since, this time it was not any self righteous/rebellious Politician or part-time/pseudo religious scholar. This time it was "science" and science is the most ruthless "creature" if you mess around with it, exactly what Agha Waqar and Co. tried to do.
Amjad
August 8, 2012 10:14 am
I guess you tried little too hard to write something humorous but you have gone way too far and your article is totally not funny, but rather insulting instead. It is the kind of humor or satire that someone may find in third rated stage shows..
Raheem Solangi
August 8, 2012 9:59 am
All are advised to examine the water kit first, then oppose the idea in cartoons, it is not a hidden from all, please proove it practicaly that water kit can not work to run th car......
Zalim singh
August 8, 2012 9:55 am
Good article sir. Nice satire.
Raheem Solangi
August 8, 2012 9:34 am
This is full of jealousy.........but seeing is believing.
Saad Mallik
August 8, 2012 9:27 am
This is awesome! One of the best on our country's state of affairs. Al-Architect-Al-Cartoonist-Al-Columnist par excellence!
Jarrar
August 8, 2012 9:16 am
This was a very nice article that comment about the drop outs made me LOL many many times
Fika77
August 8, 2012 9:04 am
Not easy being NFP
J A Toor
August 8, 2012 8:27 am
I wonder how many people were in on it? The media, the politicians, scientist, santa claus!!!
Areej Ahmad
August 8, 2012 8:07 am
Nice sarcasm!
Bang-e-Jamshaid
August 8, 2012 8:01 am
Excellent.... Adding cartoons to the blog has doubled its taste. Plz write more in future.
pakistanidresses
August 8, 2012 7:56 am
I can't believe that people are still supporting it. It had started to get on my nerves. Thanks for the article. Turned it all into laughs.